Part II of II

 

A week or two after a giving a talk on the consequences of abortion and on the resources availab e for healing after an abortion, I was approached by a woman who had an abortion well over a decade ago.  She expressed deep interest in what I described as the halting of one’s maturing process at the point of having an abortion or beginning to rely on contraception.  The phrase that stayed with her was “perpetual adolescence” as a consequence of abortion.

 

She expressed how she felt that perpetual adolescence best expressed how she had lived and that she had recently realized that it was unhealthy for herself to live this way.  She told me wanted to begin to  grow-up with the ability to care for others in an adult and truly caring manner.

 

I explained that I received the teaching on this concept from Dr. Theresa Burke and I still needed to find more resources that addressed recovery from perpetual adolescence.   As I understood the topic, there simply were not many resources then available.

 

I did ask her if she has admitted honestly to herself her responsibility in the abortion.  She said yes.

 

I asked her if she understood that it was wrong for her to have the abortion and why it was wrong.  She explained to me that she did understand it was wrong and why it was wrong.

 

I asked if she had sought to make it right with God and her child.  She told me she had.

 

She was then asked if she was now including her child in her prayers, thoughts and life.   She said yes while telling me that her child is with her always.

 

I then asked if she had begun to see other areas of her life that have been adversely affected by her failure to take responsibilities for her actions and she said she had.

 

I noted that she had also been involved in outreach to help those who are vulnerable to abortion.   I finished with telling her that I didn’t have any professional’s documentation for recovery from perpetual adolescence but that I felt she had returned to that point when she had the abortion.  She had taken responsibility for the abortion where she had not taken responsibilities for her child.  And she had begun to make amends for her lapse that had cost her child’s life.  I didn’t have the professional there to back me up, but I assured her that she had begun to grow the moment she returned to the abortion to take responsibility for her role in it.  It was then that she had already achieved considerable healing and she was on the path of growth that now has her even practicing outreach for others.  She had unwittingly been doing all the right things and was growing into a true adult mother and woman.

 

The same can be done by many others of us who have turned away from responsibility and turned instead to rely on contraception, an addiction, relying on an unhealthy relationship, remaining silent when asked to be accountable for what you did, turning to pornography, or one of countless other ways of dodging  the consequences of our actions.

 

We need to ask for the grace to see in what ways each of us may have lapsed in our accountability for our own actions.  We must then ask for the fortitude to return to the point of our earlier lapse with a renewed determination to make amends for its harmful consequences.  Our salvation and our life depend on our returning to shoulder our true responsibilities.    Perpetual adolescence can be overcome by grace and real growth into adulthood.