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Much of the harm in modern dating does not come from bad intentions.
It comes from bonding outpacing discernment.

People often sense that something moved too fast, but they struggle to explain why. Nothing obvious was wrong. No rule was broken. And yet closeness formed faster than clarity, freedom, or decision could support.

This is a problem of pacing.

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What bonding actually is

Bonding is something the body and emotions do naturally.

It develops through:

• repeated proximity,
• shared vulnerability,
• affection and physical presence,
• and time spent together.

Bonding is not a decision.
It is a human response that often begins before the will has judged where a relationship should go.

Because bonding is powerful, it needs to be understood rather than denied.

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Clarifying bonding and attachment

Bonding and attachment are related, but they are not the same.

Bonding is the natural bodily and emotional process by which closeness forms.
Attachment is the psychological pattern that can develop when bonding is repeated, shaping expectations of security, dependence, and fear of loss.

Simply put:

• bonding is the process of growing close,
• attachment is the pattern that forms when that closeness begins to govern behavior.

Bonding can exist without attachment.
Attachment does not form without prior bonding.

Because attachment can exert pressure on judgment, pace matters.

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Why pacing matters more than intent

Good intentions do not regulate bonding.
Pacing does.

Two people can care deeply and still:

• become attached without clarity,
• feel pressure without coercion,
• or continue a relationship because stopping feels harder than proceeding.

When bonding accelerates faster than discernment, the body and emotions attach before the will has chosen.

That mismatch is what creates confusion.

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Pacing protects freedom, not feelings

Pacing is not about suppressing affection or withholding care.
It is about keeping bonding and decision aligned.

Healthy pacing allows:

• understanding to catch up with feeling,
• freedom to remain real,
• and choice to remain possible.

When pace is right, closeness feels steady rather than urgent.

Order in intimacy is not rigidity; it is right sequence.

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How pressure enters without force

Pressure often appears without manipulation or malice.

It sounds like:

• “This is just how things go.”
• “We’re already this close.”
• “I don’t want to hurt them.”
• “Slowing down now would feel like rejection.”

This is not coercion.
It is attachment beginning to govern decisions that belong to discernment.

When slowing down feels more difficult than continuing, pace has already been lost.

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The role of boundaries

Boundaries are not meant to restrict intimacy, but to protect its pace as it develops.

Boundaries:

• slow bonding to a human scale,
• prevent attachment from forcing decision,
• and preserve the freedom needed for honest discernment.

They do not block closeness.
They keep closeness truthful and ordered.

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Who sets the pace

In healthy dating, pace is set by:

• the more vulnerable person,
• the greater consequence involved,
• or the need for clarity before intimacy deepens further.

Pace should never be set by:

• fear of loss,
• fear of awkwardness,
• or fear of disappointing the other.

Dating exists to support discernment, not to outrun it.

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Bonding is not love, and love is not automatic

Bonding can make a relationship feel inevitable.
But love is not a bodily response.

Love, in its fullest sense, is a choice of the will — one that accepts responsibility, promises fidelity, and is ultimately sustained by covenant.

Pacing exists so that bonding does not masquerade as love, and attachment does not substitute for decision.

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Why pacing protects love rather than delaying it

When bonding is allowed to mature without overruling discernment:

• attachment becomes integrated rather than controlling,
• affection becomes safer,
• and commitment becomes freely chosen.

Pacing does not delay love.
It protects the conditions under which love can rightly be promised.

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In one sentence

Bonding is a natural bodily and emotional process; pacing ensures that attachment does not outrun discernment or force decision.

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Cross-reference (for unity within the arc)

As discussed in When to Start and When to Stop Dating, dating serves its purpose only while intimacy and attachment remain ordered toward clear, free decision.

These essays are part of a developing series. Each stands on its own, and together they form a coherent arc meant to be returned to as one’s experience deepens.

Much of the confusion in modern dating comes from treating intimacy as a single act rather than a progressive reality.

Intimacy is not all-or-nothing.
It develops in levels, and each level carries its own responsibilities.

When these levels are confused, skipped, or rushed, people experience pressure, anxiety, and harm—even when intentions are good.

The Ladder of Intimacy exists to restore order, clarity, and freedom to how closeness develops.

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1. What intimacy means here

Intimacy is letting another person into one’s inner world.

This includes:

• time,
• attention,
• emotional access,
• trust,
• physical presence,
• and, at its furthest extent, total personal union.

Sexual activity is only one expression of intimacy, neither its whole meaning nor its beginning.

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2. The core principle

Intimacy is cumulative access.
Each level assumes responsibility for the one before it.

Problems arise not because intimacy exists, but because access deepens faster than responsibility can support.

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3. The Ladder

A. Presence

Shared time, reliability, and basic attention.

• Low vulnerability
• Low obligation
• “I show up. I notice you.”

This level should be easy to enter and easy to leave.

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B. Conversation

Personal stories, opinions, humor, and interests.

• Interpretive access begins
• Understanding starts to form
• “You know how I think.”

At this level, affirmation means being taken seriously and understood accurately—not inflated or rushed.

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C. Emotional Sharing

Feelings, hopes, disappointments, and interior reactions.

• Vulnerability increases
• Requires reciprocity and restraint
• “You know how things affect me.”

This level should unfold gradually; emotional intensity must not be used to manufacture closeness.

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D. Trust and Vulnerability

Letting another person’s response genuinely matter.

• Dependence enters
• Real risk appears
• “What you do now affects me.”

Here, affirmation becomes meaningful because it is grounded in consistency, reliability, and care, not reassurance alone.

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E. Physical / Affectional Intimacy

Touch, closeness, and embodied presence.

• The body begins to participate in bonding
• Affection carries meaning beyond words
• “My body is now part of this connection.”

This level carries disproportionate bonding power and therefore requires clarity, restraint, and shared understanding.

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F. Union Requiring Covenant

Total personal union, including body and soul, ordered toward marriage.

This level represents a form of union that engages the whole person—body and soul—not merely physical closeness.

Such a union is not created by the couple alone.
In sacramental marriage, it is received, not manufactured: a covenant in which Christ unites two persons into a shared life ordered toward fidelity, fruitfulness, and permanence.

Desire for this level of union is not a command to proceed, but a signal for discernment.
It raises the question of whether the relationship is prepared to receive a covenant capable of bearing its full human and spiritual consequences.

At this level, commitment is not an optional add-on; it is the only proportionate response.

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4. Why the ladder matters

When intimacy moves faster than clarity can support:

• attachment forms without trust,
• pressure replaces freedom,
• and confusion follows closeness.

The ladder helps people recognize:

• where they are,
• what is appropriate,
• and when something feels wrong for a reason.

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5. The role of boundaries

Boundaries are not meant to restrict intimacy, but to protect its pace as it develops.

Boundaries preserve freedom.
They prevent bonding from outrunning truth.

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6. In one sentence

Healthy intimacy develops step by step, with responsibility increasing as access deepens toward covenant.

That order protects both people—and makes love possible.

Intimacy is meant to grow from freedom, not pressure.
From mutual desire, not fear of loss.
From clarity, not momentum.

When intimacy develops without pressure, both people remain agents—able to choose, to pause, and to say no without punishment or consequence.

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1. A note on language

In this essay, intimacy does not mean sexual activity alone.
It refers more broadly to letting another person into one’s world—through conversation, emotional sharing, time, trust, vulnerability, and appropriate physical affection. Sexual intimacy is one form of this, but not the only one.

Understanding intimacy this way allows pressure to be recognized long before anything sexual occurs.

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2. What pressure actually looks like

Pressure is not always obvious or aggressive.

Often, it is subtle and relational.

Pressure appears when:

• saying no risks losing affection,
• clarity is postponed to keep closeness,
• one person sets the pace and the other adapts,
• emotional or physical closeness is treated as expected,
• momentum replaces deliberate consent (“we’re already here”).

When it becomes harder to refuse than to agree, intimacy is no longer fully free.

This is where pressure crosses into coercion.

Coercion does not require force.
It exists whenever consent is shaped by fear, imbalance, or withheld clarity.

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3. Clarity must come before closeness

Healthy intimacy grows best where there is shared understanding.

Before intimacy deepens, both people should know:

• why they are together,
• what the relationship is for,
• and whether there is a real direction toward commitment.

Closeness without clarity creates leverage.
Clarity removes leverage.

When purpose is named, intimacy can unfold without manipulation or confusion.

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4. Mutual desire sets the pace

Chemistry accelerates.
Wisdom regulates.

Healthy intimacy moves at the speed of:

• the more cautious conscience,
• the slower nervous system,
• the person with more to lose.

If one person is persuading and the other is complying, something is wrong.

Intimacy should never require convincing.

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5. Intimacy develops in layers

Not all intimacy is sexual.

Healthy intimacy often unfolds gradually:

1. presence and reliability
2. honest conversation
3. shared vulnerability with responsibility
4. appropriate physical affection
5. deeper physical intimacy aligned with commitment

Skipping layers creates false bonding—closeness without safety.

True intimacy integrates the whole person rather than isolating one part.

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6. Boundaries protect desire

In healthy intimacy:

• boundaries are respected immediately,
• “no” does not require justification,
• attraction does not disappear when access is limited.

Someone who resents boundaries is not confused—they are revealing how they relate to power.

Respect preserves desire.
Pressure corrodes it.

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7. The fruit of intimacy without pressure

When intimacy develops freely:

• people feel more themselves, not less,
• peace increases alongside attachment,
• trust deepens rather than erodes.

Anxiety, obligation, or self-betrayal are not normal signs of closeness.
They are warnings.

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8. A simple diagnostic question

After intimacy, ask:

Did this happen because I freely chose it, or because it felt harder to refuse than to agree?

The answer matters.

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9. In one sentence

Healthy intimacy grows where pressure is absent, clarity is present, and closeness increases freedom rather than fear.

That is intimacy worthy of trust.

Many people feel that dating today is harder than it used to be, even though there are more options, more tools, and more freedom than ever before.

Feeling confused is not a personal failure.
It is the predictable result of a system that has lost its purpose while intensifying intimacy.

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1. Dating lost its direction

Historically, dating pointed toward marriage or clear separation.

Modern dating often points toward:

• connection,
• chemistry,
• experience,
• or “seeing how it feels.”

When a process has no agreed-upon end, every step inside it feels unstable.
Without direction, people make up rules as they go, which leads to confusion.

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2. Intimacy increased before commitment

Modern dating frequently includes:

• emotional vulnerability,
• sexual closeness,
• constant communication,
• shared routines,

before there is clarity regarding commitment.

This creates a mismatch.

Attachment forms in the body and emotions long before there is any shared agreement about responsibility or future. The nervous system experiences bonding while the relationship remains undefined.

Confusion is the natural outcome.

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3. Language became deliberately vague

Modern dating uses terms that reduce accountability:

• “talking”
• “seeing each other”
• “not putting labels on it”
• “just going with the flow”

Vague language protects people from obligation while preserving access.

Confusion is not accidental here.
This kind of confusion actually serves a purpose in the system.

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4. Too many options undermine discernment

Dating apps and endless profiles encourage constant comparison.

Instead of asking, “Is this good and true?”
people are trained to ask, “Is there someone better?”

Discernment requires presence and attention.
Having endless choices teaches people to feel dissatisfied.

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5. Trauma is normalized rather than addressed

Many people are dating while:

• emotionally guarded,
• avoidant of commitment,
• anxious about abandonment,
• or distrustful of intimacy.

Rather than stepping back to heal, the culture encourages continued dating as if repetition alone will resolve the problem.

When people don’t heal, their relationships become unpredictable.

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6. Moral structure was removed and not replaced

Old rules were discarded, sometimes rightly.

But nothing coherent replaced them.

As a result:

• boundaries feel awkward,
• clarity feels like pressure,
• Commitment feels like a loss of freedom.

People end up making up their own relational rules as they go, which can have real emotional effects.

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7. The deeper truth

Modern dating feels confusing because it asks people to offer:

• vulnerability without vows,
• intimacy without intention,
• and loyalty without language.

This contradiction makes it hard for people to trust each other.

Reducing confusion in dating often requires:  

• slowing relational acceleration,
• communicating more directly,
• observing patterns over time,
• and being willing to clarify the relationship, rather than relying on assumptions or momentum.

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8. In one sentence

Modern dating feels confusing because it lost its purpose but became more intimate, so people end up connected without clear direction or responsibility.

Dating is not something you fall into. It is something you enter intentionally—and leave responsibly. Much of the pain around modern dating comes not from dating itself, but from starting too early, staying too long, or drifting without clarity.

1. When to start dating

You are ready to date when most of the following are true: being emotionally independent, knowing your boundaries, and having a sense of purpose.

When you are able to manage your emotions and choices without relying on someone else. You can be alone without panic, fantasy, or self-contempt. You are not looking for someone to stabilize you, rescue you, or define you. When you have some direction, even if your life is not perfectly settled.

When you can name your boundaries and standards without apology. You know what would be a serious concern or a clear disqualifier, and you are willing to act on that knowledge. If sufficient clarity arrives and you are willing to end things early, then feel confident in setting boundaries.

When you know what kind of life you are trying to build, and you have a sense of what kind of partner that life would require.

Dating begun without these conditions often becomes confusing or emotionally costly, not because people are bad, but because the foundation is weak.

2. When to stop dating someone

Dating should end as soon as sufficient clarity arrives.

That clarity may come through:

• misaligned values,
• incompatible life directions,
• repeated boundary violations,
• or a growing sense that peace is being eroded rather than built.

Staying after clarity is not kindness. It is avoidance.

Other clear signals that dating should stop include:

Chronic ambiguity

If conversations about direction, exclusivity, or purpose are consistently avoided or postponed, ambiguity itself has become the answer.

Boundary pressure

When emotional, physical, or time boundaries are repeatedly tested or dismissed, trust is being weakened, not built, signaling it may be time to reconsider the relationship.

Becoming less yourself

If you find yourself anxious, rationalizing behavior you would warn a friend about, or slowly abandoning your own judgment, something is wrong.

Dating should not require you to silence your conscience.

3. When to stop dating altogether (for a season)

Sometimes the right decision is not to end one relationship, but to pause dating itself entirely.

Pausing may be necessary if:

• you feel numb, cynical, or emotionally depleted,
• dating feels compulsive rather than discerning,
• the same unhealthy patterns keep repeating,
• or you are using dating to avoid deeper work in your life.

A pause is not failure. It is recalibration.

4. A governing principle

Dating should cost you comfort, not your integrity. Discomfort is normal. Confusion, erosion, and self-betrayal are not.

5. In one sentence

Start dating when you can act with clarity and restraint, and stop dating the moment clarity tells you it should end; such discipline protects both people and preserves freedom.

1. Dating exists for discernment.

It is the process by which two people come to understand who they are with one another, what they are offering, and whether this particular relationship can rightly move toward commitment.

Dating is not an end in itself.
It has a purpose — and when that purpose is unclear, confusion and pressure follow.

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2. Dating is ordered toward decision

Dating is meant to help answer a real question:

Should this relationship move forward toward commitment, or should it end?

That decision may be marriage.
Or it may be an honest recognition that the relationship should not continue.

Either outcome can be faithful to the purpose of dating.

What matters is that dating remains ordered toward clarity, not prolonged simply because closeness has grown or time has passed.

Discernment in dating requires:

• observing patterns over time
• communicating honestly
• allowing clarity to develop gradually
• and being willing to name reality when it becomes clear

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3. What dating is not for

Dating is not primarily for:

• entertainment,
• validation,
• curing loneliness,
• sexual access,
• or avoiding difficult decisions.

When dating takes on these roles, it quietly loses its purpose and becomes governed by momentum rather than judgment.

Closeness grows, but direction does not.

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4. Bonding is not the same as deciding

Bonding happens naturally through time, proximity, and vulnerability.
It is a bodily and emotional process, not a choice of the will.

Because bonding is powerful, it can make a relationship feel inevitable even when no decision has been made.

Dating exists to ensure that decision is not replaced by attachment, and that closeness does not substitute for discernment.

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5. Love does not lead dating — it follows decision

In modern dating, the word love is often used to justify closeness before clarity.

But love, in its fullest sense, is not a feeling that appears on its own.
It is a choice of the will — a decision to accept responsibility, promise fidelity, and bind one’s life to another.

Dating does not require love to begin.
It requires honesty, care, and discernment.

Dating helps determine whether love can rightly be promised.

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6. Confusion is not failure

The Dating Arc assumes something important: confusion is common, and often honest.

In a culture saturated with sexual and relational messaging, uncertainty is not a sign of immaturity. It is often the first signal that discernment is needed.

The most truthful thing a person can sometimes say in dating is:

• “I don’t know yet.”
• “I’m not clear.”

Dating fails not when confusion appears, but when it is ignored or hidden.

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7. Each relationship is unique

No two people are interchangeable.
No relationship is meant to be measured against another.

Dating requires each person to decide:

• who they are in this relationship,
• what they are offering,
• what they are not offering,
• and what genuinely appeals to them.

Health is not determined by comparison or timelines, but by whether this relationship is unfolding with honesty, freedom, and care for both people.

Intimacy does not require secrecy, but it does imply that much is shared relatively exclusively between the two.

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8. When dating has fulfilled its purpose

Dating fulfills its purpose when:

• clarity has emerged,
• responsibility has been faced,
• and a decision — to commit or to part — can be made honestly.

Continuing to date once clarity has been reached does not deepen discernment.
It delays it.

Ending a relationship truthfully is not a failure of dating.
It is often its success.

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9. On one sentence

Dating is for discernment — so that commitment, if it is made, is made freely, intentionally, and in order.

Dating today often feels confusing, even when intentions are good.

People date longer, grow closer faster, and feel more pressure than ever — yet clarity often arrives late, if at all. Many find themselves bonded, attached, or emotionally invested without knowing what the relationship is actually for, or how it is meant to unfold.

The Dating Arc exists to restore orientation.

It is a framework for understanding:

• what dating is for,
• how intimacy develops,
• why confusion is so common,
• and how freedom can be protected while closeness grows.

This is not advice or a set of rules.
It is a way of seeing.

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What dating is — and is not

Dating is discernment.

It is the process by which two people come to understand:

• who they are with one another,
• what they are offering,
• and whether this relationship can rightly move toward commitment.

Dating is not:

• entertainment,
• validation,
• a test of worth,
• or something that simply continues because it already exists.

When dating loses its purpose, momentum replaces meaning.

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Why confusion is normal

The Dating Arc assumes something many frameworks do not:
confusion is common, and often honest.

Modern culture is saturated with sexual and relational messaging that encourages closeness without clarity and intensity without order. In such an environment, uncertainty is not a failure — it is often the first signal that discernment is needed.

Naming confusion is not weakness.
Pretending clarity you do not have is.

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Purpose, order, and intentionality

Human relationships flourish when they have:

• purpose — a shared understanding of what they are for,
• order — a right sequence in how intimacy unfolds,
• intentionality — conscious choice rather than drift.

God acts with purpose and order, never accidentally or coercively.
Dating becomes humane when it reflects the same posture.

This framework does not presume a neutral cultural environment or shared assumptions. It is written for a world in which restraint must be chosen intentionally and clarity must be spoken.

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Intimacy, bonding, and freedom

Intimacy means letting another into one’s world.
It is not reducible to sexual activity, and it is not all-or-nothing.

Bonding happens naturally through time, proximity, and vulnerability. Because bonding is powerful, it requires pacing — not to restrict closeness, but to protect freedom and discernment.

The Dating Arc helps distinguish:

• bonding from decision,
• attachment from love,
• pressure from care.

This distinction matters because love, in its fullest sense, is not automatic.
It is a choice of the will, ultimately expressed through covenant.

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Every relationship is unique

No two people are interchangeable.
No relationship is meant to be measured against another.

Dating requires each person to decide, honestly and responsibly:

• who they are in this relationship,
• what they are offering,
• what they are not offering,
• and what genuinely appeals to them.

Health is not determined by comparison or performance, but by whether this particular relationship is unfolding with honesty, freedom, and care for both people.

Intimacy does not require secrecy, but it does imply that much is shared relatively exclusively between the two.

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How to use this series

Each essay in the Dating Arc stands on its own.
Together, they form a coherent framework meant to be returned to — before, during, and after dating.

Some essays clarify purpose.
Others name what goes wrong.
Later pieces offer ways to see where intimacy is developing and how to pace it wisely.

You do not need to read everything at once.
You do not need to agree with everything immediately.

This framework exists to help you see more clearly — so that whatever decisions are made, they are made freely, honestly, and in order.

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By Patrick A. O’Donnell December 25, 2025
Preborn Christ Spirituality

Introduction

The following prayer seeks a fruitful union with Jesus—through the Word and through the Sacraments. It asks for a meaningful integration of Christ into one’s life, which necessarily involves a willingness to change. To receive Jesus is not merely to welcome Him inwardly, but to make room for Him, to adjust one’s life to accommodate His presence, and to surrender one’s will to His Will.

Scripture speaks of Christ being formed within us (cf. Galatians 4:19). This prayer draws upon the image of spiritual conception and growth. Just as a pregnant mother must answer truthfully—even to herself—when asked if she is pregnant, “Yes, I am bearing another,” so the Christian must eventually ask: Am I now showing? Is Christ becoming visible in my life?

This prayer is a plea for that grace: not only to receive Christ, but to bear Him, nurture Him, and allow Him to be made manifest for the life of the world.

Prayer for Communion by Word or Sacrament

Seed,
Word that can save souls,
I humbly welcome You into my body.
(cf. James 1:21)

This body is not mine; it is Yours.
You have purchased it at the price of Your blood.
(cf. 1 Corinthians 6:20)

I surrender my body to You
as a living sacrifice,
holy and pleasing to God,
(cf. Romans 12:1)
as a temple of the Holy Spirit.
(cf. 1 Corinthians 6:19)

May I receive You, Jesus;
that I may conceive You, Jesus;
that I may bear You, Jesus;
that I may nurture You, Jesus.

With the labor of Mary and Your Church,
may You, Jesus, be formed within me.
(cf. Galatians 4:19)

May the two of us—You, Jesus, and I—
become one within this body of mine,
(cf. Genesis 2:24)
that I may put on the mind of Christ,
(cf. Philippians 2:5)
that You may increase and I may decrease.
(cf. John 3:30)

May I die with You,
so that I may live within You, Jesus.
(cf. Romans 6:8; 2 Timothy 2:11)

Having died,
may it no longer be I who live,
but You who live within me.
(cf. Galatians 2:19–20)

May my life remain hidden with You, Jesus.
(cf. Colossians 3:3)

May Christ be made manifest in this body.
(cf. 1 Timothy 3:16)

May I remain in You, and You in me,
that we may bear much fruit.
(cf. John 15:5)

In this body,
may I complete what is lacking
in the sufferings of Christ,
on behalf of His Body, the Church.
(cf. Colossians 1:24)

May I present Christ to others,
while seeing only Christ in the other,
as I serve Christ—
building the Body of Christ in this world.

Through Jesus,
may I participate in the life and love
of the Blessed Trinity
here in this world
and in eternal life in Heaven.

Amen.

By Patrick A. O’Donnell December 25, 2025

Concluding Reflection / Call to Prayer

To receive Christ is never a static moment—it is the beginning of a transformation. Communion, whether through the Word or the Sacrament, calls us not only to welcome Jesus inwardly, but to allow Him to grow, mature, and become visible through us.

As you pray this prayer, consider asking honestly: Where am I making room for Christ—and where am I resisting the changes His presence requires? May this prayer draw you into deeper surrender, deeper union, and a life that truly bears Christ for the sake of the world.

May the peace of Jesus in the womb of Mary be with you.

Advent is a time of preparing for that which we already have. We await Christmas Day, the revelation of Jesus, who had been physically conceived nine months previous, the Feast of the Incarnation. God revealed himself in the flesh of Mary as a separate person who lay in the manger on the first Christmas Day. We seek to reveal Christ in our flesh this coming Christmas Day. Have we taken on the mind of Christ? Are we now prepared to say, “This is my body; I give it to you,” to Jesus within ourselves?

If not, why not?

If it is because of unrepentant sin that you carry, Advent is also a period of penance and reparation. This is a perfect time, an acceptable time to examine one’s own conscience and apologize with the hope of forgiveness through absolution for any present unrepentant sin. Upon completing one’s penance and reconciliation, one can begin the process of self-examination anew. Such a second examination of conscience that begins at the graced moment of completion of the reconciliation process, given sufficient time, can often lead to a follow-up, much deeper and profound reconciliation. Yes, this is a suggestion that you plan on seeking the Sacrament of Reconciliation on two occasions before Christmas. This is a short Advent so two occasions requires seeking the Sacrament this week and a second maybe two weeks hence.

It is up to each person to decide for oneself if this Advent will be a typical period of material preparation for Christmas or a truly new beginning for your relationship with Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and ultimately with the Father. Many churches enrich the Advent season with the offer of extra opportunities for the Sacrament of Reconciliation, often with added evening opportunities to seek reconciliation through the Sacrament.

Jesus Christ is waiting with graces for you to make this a Holy Season for yourself. Don’t let yourself miss this opportunity. For this Christmas, be at least as spiritually prepared for Jesus on Christmas Day as you are so often materially ready. 

May the peace of Christ in the womb of Mary be with you.

© 2023 Patrick A. O’Donnell All Rights Reserved

This is the beginning of a series of posts that will be provide a basic and complete understanding of the spirituality of a Bearer of the Preborn Christ. This will come in small pieces through the blog while it will develop with the accumulation of each piece to a whole of all pieces combined on a single webpage.

Part One

Introduction

“…it is in dying that we are born into eternal life.” Although this last line from the Peace Prayer of Saint Francis is not believed to have been written by St. Francis, it has been embraced as capturing his spirit.1 This line highlights his perspective on mortal life as a womb where we are perfected in charity for eternal life. As eternal life and happiness with God should be the goal of everyone, Francis devoted the last half of his life to his perfection in charity. He did this by seeking to imitate the earthly life of Jesus Christ as closely as he could. In his often-dramatic fashion, Francis acted in a manner that would impress upon himself a virtue or truth about Jesus by living it himself. In this manner, he grew and developed his faith in God, preparing himself for eternal life. That he viewed it as a womb gives us a glimpse into Francis’s mostly hidden spiritual life that this study may help illuminate for us to share. 

Peace of Jesus in the womb of Mary be with you.

1 Bodo OFM, Murray, A Look at the Peace Prayer of St. Francis, Franciscan Media.org, Dec 30, 2020. https://www.franciscanmedia.org/franciscan-spirit-blog/a-look-at-the-peace-prayer-of-st-francis

© 2023 Patrick A. O’Donnell All Rights Reserved